Get all 17 Nhojj releases available on Bandcamp and save 30%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of Dream - Living Room Performances, Keep On..., Hold On (Living Room), Nhojj Poetry Vol. 3, Nhojj Poetry Vol. 2, Nhojj Poetry Vol. 1, Karaoke Vol. 2, Waiting For You, and 9 more.
1. |
||||
You are bold and loud. You speak your mind freely and easily. Like sugar cane, you are sweet and pure and good. Your skin is dark like azobe wood and your spirit warm like tropical mornings.
You give and accept love with an open heart because you haven’t learned to build walls yet. A few short years ago, life welcomed you to her shores, and life is kinder to her new immigrants.
I wanted to send you this note because even though the boy’s body will grow into the man’s experience, the inner child stays young forever, so...
Play. Make believe. Sing and dance. Climb trees and pick mangos and guavas. Eat cherries and drink coconut water, and even though you are growing taller, don’t slouch down to the level of those shorter than you, invite them to stand as tall as they can.
Run the streets barefoot with those stray dogs, and yes go on and touch one of the cows grazing in the field across from your grandmother’s house. Even though you’ll be butted away, touch and find out something new about life in a form that looks different from you.
Your time here on earth is meant to be fruitful and joyful. You understand this now, but too many forget joy as the years rush on by. I suspect you will too. Life offers many alternatives to joy, so don’t be in such a hurry to grow up. Slow down, the decades will run by fast enough, bringing with their passing falls and bruises and tears.
Accept this gift of childhood now and play. Cherish this spell of innocence and play. Play and wander and question. This is the blueprint, this is your template for happiness and freedom. In the coming years, when life begins to show you his ugly prejudices, you will need to recreate these feelings of softness to make it through those difficult times, you will need to recall and recollect... this sensation is delight, this pleasure is laughter, this sensitivity is love.
|
||||
2. |
||||
Guyanese boy. I know you don’t like being here, but believe me, here is where you ought to be. You will realize this after time and travel have exchanged your tropical paradise for a foreign concrete jungle. Only then will you appreciate native sunshine playing in rain, forest hills caressing plaines, and simple joy dancing passionately with pain.
I know. One moment people here appear beautiful like African butterflies sucking nectar from hibiscus flowers. The next moment they are like mosquitoes - buzzing and biting and sucking blood from you...
“He too soft...”
“He voice too high...”
“He walk too girly...”
“He act too effeminate...”
It hurts... I know. Rejection is never easy, but sooner or later rejection happens to everyone... everywhere. You cannot escape this pain by learning to hit cricket balls. You cannot stop this rain by trying to dribble basketballs. Dreaming of developing big muscles will not make a hill into a plain. Hiding within yourself will not help you either, hiding will only make you dull and bland like Mashramani without color, costume and calypso.
Right now you feel alone and misunderstood, stranded on an island with no name. But now is not the time to give into fear and shame, even though shame and fear is what you feel the most. No my dear boy, now is the time to hold onto yourself. Hold onto yourself and realize that you are good and right and wonderfully made.
Others will try to tell you otherwise. You have to allow people their beliefs, even as you realize beliefs are just, well.. beliefs. No factual evidence is required to develop or support a belief. People believe all kinds of things, for all kinds of reasons. Some beliefs serve more than others... to thrive you must find beliefs that serve you.
If you are truly fortunate, those around you give you the acceptance you need and deserve, but chances are, they are too busy with life to give you the messages you need when you need them most. So learn to whisper daily in your own ear, the words you long to hear.
I respect you
I appreciate you
I love you
Only then will you be able to see the strength in your softness, hear the depth in your falsetto and feel the power in allowing your femininity to walk side by side with your masculinity, proudly, with her head up, receiving all the respect she deserves.
This is a lot to take in, I know. But if you grasp nothing else, remember this...
I love you
Just the way you are
And I always will.
|
||||
3. |
||||
You taste freedom on your lips. And it is sweet. All your life, you have been squeezing between the letters of The Word. Enclosed on either side by religious eyes that didn’t see you, holy ears that didn’t hear you and sanctified mouths that preached sermons that didn’t move you. You have been wearing the suite and tie of expectation and propriety, and now you are free. Yes there was laughter and friendship and music and love, but you hungered for acceptance too.
Now you are here, ready to take a bite out of the Big Apple. While you wrap your mind around college, X-rays and technology, allow me to plant some seeds that will sprout in due time.
Career
Your aims are sensible and it is good to be sensible, sometimes, but your passions, as irrational as they may seem, are also valuable, and they too deserve your attention and protection.
Pleasure
Do not be afraid of the big “P”. Do not lock pleasure up in a steel box because others have done so. Yes it can burn worse than hot wax on bare skin, but that just means care and respect are due. You already sense the importance of finding your own answers to the questions of this life. Now remember this, your desires define you just as much as your genes do. Embrace them safely and lovingly and honestly.
Sexuality
You live in a culture that has, from the very beginning, communicated its misogyny, homophobia and transphobia to you. You saw “those men” walking the streets at night, some dressed in women’s clothing, amidst the disappointment and decay of slum life, and you knew, without a doubt, they were society’s outcaste, the lowest of the low. You heard the taunts from kids who didn’t even know your name, and you felt the net closing in and you ran, scared. But, as time will tell, you cannot run from yourself...
There is a reason for your homosexuality. It is a piece of the puzzle that is your life. When you begin to fit all the pieces together, you will see the big picture forming, and you will realize how beautiful you are.
How beautiful you are
Beautiful you are
You are
You
|
||||
4. |
||||
He must have been an African warrior in a past life. Dark and muscled and sweet like chocolate, tasting him was a pleasure. When he laughed, his eyes crinkled and almost closed. Pure blind joy. He relished his laughs... and his love making. Passion and intensity and honey... and he was spiritual like a Buddhist too.
You knew he was the one... you wanted to be near him, drink in his scarred beauty, lay basking in the glow of his gaze, and share his tomorrows as well as his yesterdays. His arms made you feel safe.
But then summer ended and that terrible storm came. It must have rained forty days and forty nights...
The breakup wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t his fault. Breakups aren’t anyone’s fault. Life is a circle - spring summer fall... and we all are peddling as best we can within the seasons of our life. The old folks used to say, “we are where we are” and you can’t fault a human being for being where he is.
The words “lost love” float around so frequently, but love isn’t loose change. You can’t lose it. That notion lies in the realm of myths and movies. You may not hear love’s words, or feel love’s skin, or smell love’s sweat, but love is never lost. Love is not a feeling that goes up and down depending on who is in your life and in your bed. Do not confuse love with relationships, and do not define relationships by how they end or the fact that they do sometimes end sooner than you’d like. All things must end, that is how new things are born. It is up to you to decide what new things will be born within you.
In my esteem, it matters not how long you two were together, only that you two were together, and you loved him. You loved.
You keep the love you make. You can choose to keep it in a dirty, broken memory box, or you can hold the memory of love in your heart, bond safely with thoughts of gratitude.
Right now, in this period of heartache and grief, the strings of gratitude may elude your grasp. Endings are painful and you must allow for this.
But after the rain falls, the clouds part and the sun shines again.
Let sun’s rays kiss your face... your neck... your back... your legs... the soles of your feet and make you whole again. You won’t be the same as before - broken hearts are always a little tender, but in a hard world, tenderness is rare and valuable.
Only with tenderness will you be able to remember mornings of passion and pancakes and say thank you... hear the music of his smile and say thank you. Feel the strength of his hand in yours and say thank you.
When we are thankful for the love we‘ve made, we automatically attract more love into our lives. Love, like everyone else, loves to be around those who love it, and cherish it, and remember it... fondly.
|
||||
5. |
||||
Look at you! Celebrating another birthday. You are blessed. Many people never make it to this age. Remember when you couldn’t imagine a life past 30? Now here you are.
I am proud of you. Even as your body discovers new aches and grey hairs, your heart discovers new reasons to forgive. You made mistakes, costly mistakes. And others made mistakes, painful mistakes. Angrily, you could have stayed locked in your room of regret, unable to move on, but instead you opened the door and ventured outside into the sunshine. You are learning to let the past go and I am proud of you.
Mom used to say, “after one time is another.” I didn’t know what that meant at the time, but now I do.
Each age has new sights and sounds and opportunities to explore. You can now spread wings made strong by failure and disappointment, made wide by trial and error, and soar to new horizons.
As you soar and explore, remember to tell the man in the mirror daily how much you love and approve and respect and admire him. See the love and appreciation reflected in his eyes and accept this as living proof that you have found the greatest love of all. When you find love within, you find love everywhere.
And regardless of how much society scoffs at the notion of love, you know from experience, love is the greatest power in one’s life. Without love we are nothing but bones and teeth and skin and nails turning to dust. But you sense, on a gut level, we are more than the sum of our parts. We are much more...
So today, celebrate the whole with love and respect, trusting that the love that has brought you this far will take you further into moments of deeper peace and greater joy.
Gandhi spoke the truth, if you want to change the world, begin by changing yourself, begin with love.
|
||||
6. |
Interrupt Worry...
01:03
|
|||
Worry is a liar
Promising relief
If only I spend
One more second...
One more minute...
One more hour...
Worrying
Worry is a liar
Dangling satisfaction
If only I obsess a bit longer
On this problem
A solution will appear
If only I obsess a bit longer
A solution will appear
Worry says
If only I obsess...
But for all my worrying
All I get is more worry
So
Stop. Take a breath
Stop. Journal these feelings
Stop. Go for a walk
Stop. Think of better days
Stop. Plan for better days
Stop. Take an action towards better days
By any means necessary
Interrupt worry with small acts of
Joy
|
||||
7. |
Sea of Humanity
01:19
|
|||
She starts her day
With a dose of news
Angry and frustrated
She logs into Facebook
Vents and inevitably picks a fight
With someone from the opposition...
Who also starts his day
With a dose of news
Angry and frustrated
He also logs into Facebook
To vent and inevitably picks a fight
With someone from the opposition
They meet in the comments section
Of some inflammatory post...
And the war wages on
Each believing the other
To be the devil incarnate
In reality
Each is just a person
Paddling as best they can
With broken oars
History gave them
Firmly grasped within their hands
Trying desperately to make their way...
In this sea of humanity
I pray
Compassion be reborn within us
Loosen our grips on old broken oars
Allow us to reach for new and better ones
So the children of mothers
Young and old can rest on the seashore and
Not be lost at sea
|
||||
8. |
Be the Change...
01:29
|
|||
We protest violence
In our neighborhoods
In our schools
but
Watch the latest action thriller blockbuster movie
Consuming violence for entertainment
We decry violence
Against our women
Against our children
but
Tune into TV shows where women beat each other up and down with violent language
We march against police brutality and gun violence
but
Play video games based on brutality and gun violence
Technology may have replaced the Roman colosseum
but
Our society’s appetite for violence remains
News headlines reflect this
Unfortunately
I believe we will continue to lose souls to violence
Until our societal addiction to violence is confronted and treated
but
Who is society?
It is easy to point a finger
but
For every finger I point at another
3 fingers point back at me
It is time for us to treat our own personal addiction to violence
In whatever form it appears
With all the commitment and compassion that overcoming addiction requires
If
We want to see change in our world
We must be change in our world.
|
||||
9. |
||||
Marching and protests change laws
And laws need to be changed
But only love changes people
Until we change people
We’ll continually be marching and protesting to change laws
I think it’s time to talk about it...
I’m calling for serious discussions on
Love
|
||||
10. |
Beach Meditation
03:46
|
|||
I am floating
In the arms of the ocean
Clouds
Drawn abstract white on blue paper
Float languidly
Fluffy like cotton wool
Glued to cardboard for kindergarten
Salt water brings back the present
Salt water diving into my mouth
Salt water drumming against protective walls of wax while
Reggae music jams out the window of some parked car
Rhythm and rhyme and
Little brown boys
Racing horses bareback on the sand
Indulging in freedom and
Black boy joy
Last week
Bake and king fish
Peanut punch and sea moss
Made right before my eyes
Tastebuds preparing to party with soca and calypso
Right here on the beach with
Football and
Laughter and
Friends and waves
Crashing into backs, sides and shores
Memories of times before and that
Long drive round and round and round the dizzying sharp bends
Eyelids fluttering with views from on high of
The bay
The branches of trees outstretched over
Ferns, mudslides and fruit
Sold fresh from the road side
Today
Opens the door to a new world below
Looking out on water, waves, sand and surf
A skyline of hills and trees
I thought of the sea in surface terms
Then the contradictions go on
Over eyes and nose and mouth and
Now I see
Silver translucent fish darting between my legs
Ivory tinted crabs scurrying deeper into the sand
Coral sporting carnival costumes
And a dull plastic bottle next to a silver wrapping sparkling too brightly in the sunlight
Tomorrow will be…
Dotted with children playing
Laughing happy with a puppy
Darting on rocks jotting out into the choppy brine
While men…
Skin blackened by sun and genes
Locs burnt brown by daily routines of sun and salt water
Lime
Play dominos and argue with their wives and girlfriends outside their brightly hued huts
Their wares of coconut art and bracelets exposed
Their words peppered with accents that sing
Rising and falling
Mirroring the tides the
Sway of palm trees a
Gathering of pebbles where
Water dances with
Breeze
Now
Diamonds sparkle like waves
Touching on a horizon that never ends
Water blue and green like emerald and topaz
Mountainside painted in colors of rainbow
Brush strokes of tiny wooden houses and the
Air gentle and steady
Like a meditation
Soothing my face my arms my soul
As a world in chaos dances to and fro
Echoing life I sit inside a bubble of
Peace
|
||||
11. |
Living in Caribbean Time
01:38
|
|||
She smiled so sweetly
As she said
No towels left... come back in 5 minutes
So
I headed out to the street
Heart set on...
Coconut water and jelly
I’d been dreaming of this moment
I walked
Like the locals
On the gravel
On the side of the narrow road
They generously called highway
Avoiding the puddles
Topped off daily by rains
In the car ride over here
The coconut man seemed closer
Now the seconds trudged into minutes
We spoke for a bit
Me getting prices and hours of operation
Him getting sale
I wasn’t going to be on the island for long
But I was going to drink all the coconut water I could
To make up for all the lost years abroad
With this understanding forming
We smiled at each other
Coconut man and me
His braids and my locs
Nodding in some kind of subconscious otherworldly agreement
Now with joy welling up within my soul
I made my way
Back to the beach towel lady
She
Still giving me the sweet eye
said
5 minutes pass already?
It would be an hour before I got those towels
I smiled too... it was good to be back
Living in Caribbean time
|
||||
12. |
||||
Tonight’s the night little mango seed
You’ve been sitting in my sink
For the last few days but
Tonight’s the night
So many of your sisters and brothers
Get tossed out into the darkness of plastic bags
Taken out to dumpsters with garbage
To pile up and accumulate in seas and landfills
Where nothing can grow or flourish
But tonight’s the night
I smuggle you out onto the soil
To live or die free among other plants
This is the fighting chance
We all deserve
Plants and animals and humans alike
To grow and blossom
I do hope you grow
We need more trees... new trees
Help replace the ones we cut down and consume for paper and chairs and steps
Yes I know...
It would be great to replant trees in the Amazon
But I’m not in the Amazon
I’m here and
I have this seed
From this mango I ate
Mango and watermelon and guinep and cashew apples and
That patch of vegetation growing wild and free over there will do just fine
Now
There you go
Even if you don’t grow
You’ll break down and
Help replenish the earth
This earth that is so much in need of replenishing
|
||||
13. |
||||
We could see it coming over the sea
A dark cloud of beauty
A dark cloud of relief
Relief from the heat
Hot and humid and heavy
Like a wool blanket on a summer afternoon
Perspiration dripping down brows
Backs soaked wet with droplets of sweat
Then the rains came...
I remember these rains
Drops big like guinep
Pelting down from the sky
Beating rhythms on galvanized roofs
Like a million little rain spirit feet pounding a complex and mesmerizing African dance
Heavy and wild and glorious
And then like magic it’s gone
Leaving in it’s wake
The sound of birds
This land is the place where I stayed
While I waited to grow up and move away...
|
||||
14. |
Caught in the Rain...
01:47
|
|||
I went out to the
Park to move muscles
Hang from monkey bars
Spray painted red and blue to
Match the swings
Children don’t seem to use anymore
I wanted to
Let my inner child run free
Play a bit
Get my heartbeat up just
Like when I was younger and
You couldn’t pay me to stay indoors
I love...
Soaking up sun rays
Communing respectfully with bees and
Ants and other such living things that
Dwell in the grass and
Distill messages from flowers others might call weeds
It was while I was
Frolicking merry and gay that the
First few drops descended
Mind you I’d seen the clouds and
Instinct whispered something about an umbrella
But the experts from my smart phone forecasted
Only clouds and so only clouds
It must be until more
Drops started materializing
Marching vigorously across my
Face and arms and hair until
Finally I conceded and
Ran for cover under the
Leaves of trees
Down the drops stormed
Like grasshoppers playing tag upon my back
Making me squirm and wiggle until the
Beauty of the thing lifted misty eyes and
I became amazement and wonder and
Gratitude
Surrounded by branches nodding in
Agreement to the sermon
Sister wind preached
Thunder shouting ache and amen and
Me beholding who
God is
|
||||
15. |
Self Love.
01:31
|
|||
Self love I say and
Some shake their heads and point
Somewhere outside themselves
Sharing their view of truth
Truth so cosmic
Truth so immense
Truth that would require
Millions of lifetimes to begin to grasp its entirety...
So I say
Grasp at whatever
Bit is closest to you
&
Let the music play...
Cause
Not every tree is an oak
Not every song is called folk
Different roads lead us home and I know
Different guys named Jerome
Not only fish live in the sea and
There’s no one exactly like you or me so
Let people be
Let people live
Let people love
Does it really matter whether love begins
Inward and expands outward or starts
Outward and moves inward or
Comes from above and bleeds down below or sleeps
Below and blossoms heavenward
Love creates love because, and
I’m sure all the religions would agree...
God is love
So just
Love folks
Love stronger
Love harder
Love softer
Love sweeter
Love
|
||||
16. |
||||
The older gentleman pulled out weeds
To make way for his vegetable garden
But couldn’t understand why
They cut down the mulberry trees to make way for their plaza
The black woman at the meeting said
Why do you care? It’s just a tree
But didn’t understand when they said
Why should we care?
It’s just women...
It’s just blacks...
It’s just gays...
It’s just immigrants...
We value lives differently because
We have different values
but
Life is life
&
People are people
No life is more valuable than another
No life is less valuable than the other
So be kind good people
Be kind and respect all life
&
Life which lives in all
Will reciprocate and be
Kind to you
Too
|
||||
17. |
||||
No need to tarry
Intercepting crumbs and leftovers on their way to the floor
You could be seated
At your own table, small as it may be
Enjoying fresh delicacies from your own garden
I’ve seen the fruits of your labor
You’ve grown so much
Mouth waters with praise
Kneaded into words like raisins with
Smiles of encouragement
You were made for this
Bounty of blessings
Bounty of good-
Will
Falling like rain
Inspiring this well of green leafy vegetables to sprout and flourish
I’ll pass this gift onto you
A rich seasoning for any stew
Observe what others say and do
Wait and let the tea brew and
If another’s spirit be true
One and one will equal more than two
Even as feelings turn blue
You’ll be grateful for this breathtaking view from this table where you sit and nourish body mind and soul...
So wash away the dirty knives and forks
They served well yesterday’s meal but
Today is a new day and deserves a
Clean set of wares...
|
||||
18. |
Handling Rejection...
03:12
|
|||
My friend
You are here again
Between the ropes
Life has knocked you down so many times
So many times
You’ve awakened
Face down in this ring staring
Dazed at opponent’s shoes
Your blood sweat and tears dripping onto floorboards
Soaking into Mother Earth
While crowds all around you roared
Some cheering
Some jeering
Referees leering and you
Down for the count
5 6 7 8
Wait
This is where you can pause that movie
Rest in silence
Breathe
In this moment
Time does not exist
Here and now
Breathe again
Take in oxygen and
Memories of why you are here
What passion brought you this far?
What will of force drove you in that
Rickety old car down that street and
Up the next
Delivering you trembling with
Excitement and bits of fear lodged here and there
To this place to this venue
What spirit called you by your name
Pulling you from despondency and complacency and
Handed you this skeleton key so
You could open every door you met closed and locked
Life has no guarantees
Except this...
If you don’t get up
You’ll always be down
So take another breath
Your 3rd...
Call upon your ancestors and
All the powers of love and forgiveness and acceptance
Cause nothing good ever happens without these fairy God Mothers
Plant your hands on these sticky wet floorboards and
Rise from the ground
Rise again and
Again and
Again
Until you die or arrive limping and
Happy at some finish line in the end
Triumphant but above all...
Satisfied
|
||||
19. |
||||
I heard him
Expose his bias
Saw him
Struggle to wrap his mind around a
Reality that wasn’t his own
He asked questions...
Questions that made me cringe...
Made me want to jump in
Defend her... But
What prejudice in me made me...
Think she couldn’t defend herself...
She was young but
She answered
Sharing
Her own experience in
Her own words expressing what
She believed to be important
Her truth met his
Defenses went up automatically
But
I would later realize
He was doing his best
Doing his best to...
Reconcile her experience with his... fit
Her black experience into his whiteness
I could see him sitting on that suitcase, trying to zip it shut, but nothing would concede. The contents refused to resolve itself within the parameters of his consciousness. So, once again late, he hurried down the corridor, tripping over all the aspects of life that fell out as he raced to catch his departing train... heading west, while she quietly got back on her train... heading east. They would pass each other in the night, his train on its predetermined track, never stopping or even slowing down to receive the gift she had just given him... the gift of her honesty.
He’d done the same thing to me years before, when “the subject” popped up unexpectedly over a dinner table. He’d subjected me to the same scrutiny, and I got the distinct impression that he’d found my answers lacking in truth. Maybe, his tone suggested, I was imagining, like children do, monsters under my bed, that didn’t really exist.
But who knows, maybe monsters do exist under beds, and children (and those society dismisses as insane) are the only souls sensitive enough to recognize our nightly fears for what they truly are. I don’t know... what I do know is that I am old enough to know that I don’t know everything.
Anyway now back on his train...
He sat in the lap of luxury
Sun streaming through wide windows
Beauty dancing all around him but...
His brows wouldn’t let go of worry
The daily news reports
Like this young woman’s answers
Played like a broken record
Over and over and over again
Reducing the music of his
Life to a crazy loop
It perplexed him
This horror film
With its
Same cast
Same script
Same scenes
Same credits
But even as the images flashed across his screen
His mind refused to decipher
The message written on the under side of
His education and success
He couldn’t crack the code
In all his years
Living on Mother Earth
No formula had presented itself to him
No equation had...
When worked out in the
Logic and reason of these modern times
Produced any result that even remotely resembled these everyday atrocities
Even after driving
Every weekend
Year after year, from
His secluded upper-crust neighborhood
Across the train tracks to
The black church
On the other side of town, and
Reveling...
Yes reveling in that music
Loud and intense, and with all that
Hand-clapping and feet-stomping
Bodies swaying
Palms lifted
Still trying to make it over
Still praying for deliverance
Still wondering in the wilderness
Still trying to reach the promised land
Shoutin’ and catchin’ spirits... resurrecting
Gods and traditions from another time
A darker time when the word
“Black” was beautiful
Not an ugly metaphor for sin and sinner
Don’t get me wrong, he was by no means a bad man. Not in the least bit, he was a good man. Good in heart and in deed. That is probably why he sat here, on this train, on this Saturday afternoon wrestling, like doubting Thomas, with his thoughts. A lesser man wouldn’t have bothered with this particular problem, this particular problem that reached back, like the hands of time, through centuries and over continents... this particular problem that still, to this day, lingers in the hearts of so many, trying desperately to build themselves up to be more... and who doesn’t want to be more?
I guess that was the slap in the face
I expected empty souls
Who had nothing in their hearts
To reach and grab and
Take everything they could
But a man with such kindness...
A good man who did good deeds would, I thought, understand what so many understood so well. An intelligent man, who did intelligent things, would recognize this element in our world that was so obvious to so many... including me.
This frustrated me to no end... but why?
Why was I allowing this man’s ignorance to affect my peace of mind?
Why was it so important that he understand?
Why was his stamp of approval needed to validate my experience?
Answer honestly: I wanted him to see me... truly see me and understand me and respect my experience... our experience.
But now that I admit this, he doesn’t seem as important. Yes it is nice to be seen and respected, it may even be essential to our wellbeing, but seen by whom? I don’t know if one can make another see what they don’t want to see... respect what they don’t want to respect. Of course one can teach another to behave respectfully, but behaving and being are not exactly the same. In these instances, I believe it is up to us to see ourselves... respect ourselves.
So I do the work...
I sit on my own suitcase, full of my own shortcomings, and resolve and fold them neatly, one by one, using the parameters of my present consciousness.
I observe the trains of thought I jump on daily, and pay attention to the lines I avoid and the routes I miss.
I give what I want to receive - understanding, compassion and respect.
Finally, I do my best to recognize another’s truth within myself. As Dr. Maya Angelou once said, “I am a human being; nothing human can be alien to me.” So I recognize it all, I accept it all - the highest highs and the lowest lows. Remembering this mantra gifts me the opportunity of walking a mile, or maybe the privilege of just a few steps, in another’s shoes, be it sneakers... stilettos... timberlands... or penny loafers... realizing with each step the simple truth that we are indeed one. One love.
|
||||
20. |
Who We Are...
00:15
|
|||
A song
The melody of our souls
We hum this melody during the dark nights
And those who hear it remember
We are attuned to the frequency of love
And smile
|
||||
21. |
||||
I’d just arrived in Trinidad, just off the boat, so to speak... from Guyana. I was 14 and had longed for this move. It came, as all good things do, with a list, short as it was, of cons which became uncomfortably clear after my first few days in my new high school.
For starters, my pants... my long school pants were apparently too short, revealing way too much sock around the ankles. Michael Jackson had made the thing popular a few years back, but I guess the fad had passed without my knowledge. One of my classmates (who will remain nameless) would often ask, with too much glee in his eyes, if I was expecting a flood. And even though I hadn’t realized it, my years in Guyana had left me with a bit of a Guyanese accent which on one or two occasions seemed to offend the ears of my new Trinidadian compadres. But these were minor things, overall I was happy... happy to be here in sweet T&T.
It was into this new and exciting life she strode, smiling that bright, easy smile... a smile like spring. Of course back then I didn’t know what spring really was, but that generous spectacle of warmth and color that arrives after a season of bitter cold describes her perfectly. Months had passed since our first introduction, but that was just a precursor to this moment... this moment that would bond two teenagers forever. It’s interesting how simple moments can blossom into lifelong memories.
We were hanging out, a group of us, one Saturday night, “liming” as we Caribbean folk like to say. Someone was relating a personal story, I don’t remember what it was now, but I do remember I was standing on the outskirts of the group, listening. When the story came to its conclusion, I nonchalantly said, under my breath, something along the lines of, “well, you win some and you loose some...”
The words weren’t meant for anyone’s ears, it was just my natural response to the story I’d just heard. The phrase expressed my attitude towards life in general. But as it turned out, I wasn’t alone on the outskirts of that group, she was standing right next to me. She turned and looked at me with recognition in her eyes. I still remember that look after all these years... that look of one soul recognizing another soul... a kindred soul.
That was over 20 years ago, and we’re still the best of friends. I’m so thankful for my friends.
|
||||
22. |
||||
His body isn't young
Anymore...
Grey hairs cover his face and
Scalp like snow covers ground
He doesn't have a dancer's body
He doesn’t have a dancer’s grace
He's tall and probably weighs a
Little more than he should
Most would look and see...
A man
Plane and simple
Nothing delicate
Nothing sensitive
Just a regular bro with no
Special gift for dance
But he dances anyway…
&
When he dances
I feel his every move
Sculptured on disappointment
Seasoned with heartache
Punctuated by every mistake
He’s a worn jacket turned inside out
Ready to be sewn lovingly with
Needle and thread and this
Melody floating on winds
Tilt your head
Bird song
Spread your wings
Bird song
Look on his face
Lines creased into concentration
Inner awareness awake and rising
His spirit drifting from heavy to light
His body gesticulating articulating
A spin a twirl a jump a hop
Hands going this way and that
Weaving a basket of truth
One cup Africa
Two pinches Alvin Ailey
Stirred together with a fistful of heart
In a pot over open fire
An elixir simmering...
Going round and round
Floating now in slow motion
Cards revealing the secrets of
Life and death and how they dance
Together through time, so...
Every wave of the palm. Every flick of the wrist
Every bend of the arm. Every twist of the hip
Every lift of the thigh. Every touch of soul through sole on
Mother Earth...
Becomes...
A moment to savor
A breath to breathe in air
A chance to remember scent of
Bananas yellow on the kitchen table
Simple pleasures like
Honey on tongue
In this present
Amidst these gifts
His intention is clear
To be here
Make this dance the best dance
Dance like this dance is the last dance
Every time
Every single rhyme
Expressed now let the rest
Just be
|
||||
23. |
A Poem for Parents
01:05
|
|||
The saying goes...
The apple doesn’t fall
Far from the tree
But
When the tree stands
On a hill, it is only natural for its
Fruit to roll down the hill into
The valleys below...
The higher the hill
On which the tree stands
The further its offspring will probably fall...
But
That only means
Folk dwelling in the valleys below...
Folk who can’t make it up the hill
To sit under branches and enjoy your cool shade
...may also enjoy fresh apples
The best part though is this record...
After the people had eaten their fill and
Tossed the seeds aside, the
Soil opened her arms and embraced them, and in time
The seeds... became
The seedlings... and the seedlings became the trees...
New trees
Standing in new places
But bearing the same fruit
The same fruit as the parent fruit
The same fruit as
You
|
||||
24. |
The Water Prayer
03:54
|
|||
I seldom
Imagine you as you are
Running in streams and lakes
Gathering like family outings at sea
Drifting home to oceans
Arm in arm with sunsets
Waves kissing shores
Goodnight whispering
Sleep well on your
River beds of stone and coral reef
Mist rising heavenward
Dreaming of jellyfish and
Descending like dew at dawn
Water...
First Peoples say...
You are alive
You form a silver circle with Sister Moon
Mirroring stars who secretly lend us
Stardust embedded in our bodies so
We may shine from time to time and
Remember to gaze up on dark nights
Water...
First Peoples say...
You are alive
You carry messages from beyond
Sprinkling memory and magic and meaning
Watering a planet hungry for mystery and truth
Water...
First Peoples say...
You are alive
Spring
Summer
Fall...
Season following season
Generation following generation
A circle of life...
Closed to all but us
Living on this planet
You float up to sky father
&
Fall down like rain
Sinking like drops into the recesses of
Mother Earth only to rise again when
Called forth by the sun
Helping all things grow in the process
Water...
First Peoples say...
You are alive
So this morning
I kneel at your banks
Praying this prayer of peace
Permeates the molecules of your being
&
Spaces in between
Merging with all
Prayers of all ancestors…
As you rise again
Becoming clouds floating
Over mountain high and valley low
Over penthouse and hut alike
Over tree and wild flower and
Soil where oranges and dandelions
Sway in the wind
&
Naked limbs shiver in the cold as
Winter strips us of leaves and light
Chaos swirling all around us like a storm...
Even in this dead of night
May your peace fall like
Snowflakes no two alike tonight
On children dreaming of
Holidays and magic
Because
We all have been children dreaming of
Holidays and magic
So shower the gifts of abundance...
Food and medical supplies and hope
Coat city and village and town
Fill our hearts with
A memory of love
A deeper meaning of kindness...
So wherever we fall
Flowers may blossom like spring again
Returning year after year
Season after season
Generation after generation
A circle a
Rainbow of beauty and
Blessings...
Aché
|
||||
25. |
||||
Being out here can sometimes feel scary, but out here is where we need to be. We the soft spoken often allow others free reign, but the gifts we have been given are just as meaningful.
So I speak. And remind myself that it is important to speak, regardless of how uncomfortable it is. It is good to shine the spotlight on peace and hope.
I have made mistakes too, but now I encourage you, as I encourage me... in this new year, that will ring in with fireworks and sparkling toasts, speak more... speak in whatever form you are called to speak, but speak more.
Don’t let past failures prevent you from trying again. Try again... try doing it differently, but try again... and again if needs be. If it has been given to you to do, do it. Share what you have been given, the world needs you, you may be holding the missing piece to this puzzle called life.
|
Nhojj Orlando, Florida
Singer/songwriter and poet wading through the rivers of R&B, soul, jazz, and reggae.
My intention is to create sonic spaces where you can experience yourself through the lens of love and acceptance.
Streaming and Download help